The month of August is arriving. In about 10 minutes. I am extremely excited for it. I am looking forward to a whole month of going straight at support raising. This weekend I may go to Tim’s cottage, but I’m still debating whether or not to. I’m also planning another trip to Ottawa, except for a longer period of time (approximately a week) to do some support raising there on a full-time basis.

When I was out in Whistler, someone told me that they think I’m “the man”. This was after I dramatically fell off my bike and still managed to make it look graceful. Honestly, I don’t think I’m “the man”. The instance of pride that I had was the pride that came right before that fall. So you can tell me all you want that I’m “the man”, but you know what, I’m not.

I’m still working towards becoming a better man, however. There were quite a few instances during Staff Conference when I was sitting at a table with people I didn’t know, and making small talk seemed like the last thing I could do. It seems I can relate very well to university students and new staff, but not to married couples with four children and one of those children slung around their shoulder. I remember their names, however (the couple, not their children). I remember the many times when I tried my best to talk to people and to get beyond the primary level of conversation. I’ve still got a long ways to go in that aspect too. I’ve realized that I really am poor at talking to people, and I need to work on that more. Somehow.

All through conference it seemed like I wanted time alone, to escape the large crowds and go do my own thing. Back home now, I’m craving community and a circle of friends that I can relate to.

I have been reading through Soul Cravings by Erwin McManus, and I stormed right through all three DVD’s of the CRAVE series. If you haven’t sat down and watched those DVD’s, it is revolutionary to watch. This is what I’ve personally looked for, for a long time. For myself, and for my ministry. Something that I can graphically accept, cinematically be comfortable with, and spiritually resonate with. But anyways, in Soul Cravings, Entry #13 of “Intimacy” describes each human being’s need for relationship:

You will spend your life working through relationships trying to understand your need for love, your inadequacies in love, your desperation for love, and all the time you might miss the signs that your heart is giving you, that you’re searching for God.

We need each other; we need people; we need community; we need relationship; we need God.

They are all interconnected, and it flows in both directions. We try to fill our vacuum for God with people, and we find ourselves frustrated and empty.

When we turn to God, we find our hearts open to people and discover our need for them more than ever before.

I’m not really tired. I was tired a couple hours ago. I think the jet lag is actually keeping me up… not a good thing; I have a church membership interview tomorrow morning.

Taryn and Lyndsay’s wedding. Good times. Unfortunately a lack of guys at this wedding. The representation from Taryn’s side was lacking, likely because most of his buddies are from Calgary, of course. My role in the wedding was to do video. After Paul and Laura’s wedding last year, I swore I wouldn’t do wedding videography ever again, but there I was, toting the camcorder and capturing every moment. It was pretty fun, nonetheless, with the wedding party stopping into a Tim Horton’s after the ceremony, and the guys going for a few drives at the driving range with some uber huge Nike drivers. Taryn doesn’t care much for tradition or what’s normal; he’ll do things totally out of the box and just have fun.

I have met so many new people in the last few weeks it’s astounding. I try to remember but it gets harder and harder. Tonight I forgot someone’s name multiple times at the banquet, I had to say it over and over in my head before it stuck. I guess it’s a lot more fun and a lot more challenging when I introduce myself to literally everyone — photographers, waiters, supervisors, DJ’s, brides’ brothers, wedding parents, bike rental employees. Somehow I still remember that it was Ryan and Curtis who helped us out at the Whistler Clearance Centre for renting cross-country mountain bikes. I think I remember distinctly praying to God to give me a better ability to remember people’s names so that I can be a better friend, leader, and greeter.

Having gone to four of almost eight weddings this summer, I am starting to understand more about myself and my single state. I hadn’t been discontent in it for the longest while, but attending weddings (in addition to being expensive) has helped me understand that I am as confused as ever. And that I still need God to be lord over my life in the area of my singleness and desire go after someone. I believe that I am at the point when I’m sitting in the car wondering as loudly in my mind as I can “God, what the heck is going on in my life? Who is she? How do I find her? And how do I know when you’re telling me?”

I’m not sure what to say next.

It has been a long day. After missing a flight in Calgary destined for Vancouver at 7:50am, I had to pay a $160 same day change fee to get on the next flight at 9:00am. How frustrating. I waited at the Vancouver airport for about 3 hours before I found some other Crusade staff somewhere, and then waited with them for a while longer before we got on the bus to go to Abbotsford.

Even for the first session tonight, I have already been asked to help out with various things. I guess that’s not unique to me, other people must have been asked to help out also. We managed to scrummage up a set of slides for the lyrics for the worship session, as well as play a WMV over the LCD projector recapping this year’s milestones in the campus ministry. Too bad there was so much static in the system, however. In general I feel like I’m in a great place with so many people with the same passions and interests. But I also feel like I may get overwhelmed since there are so many people I could feel obligated to talk to, when in fact in such an environment my natural tendency is really to close up and just observe things. I guess I shouldn’t try to fight it. I can just be myself.

Later in the evening the gym opened up and we were able to play sports (volleyball, floor hockey). I have to say, this is pretty intense sports. The guys are all really good at hockey, and some really good at volleyball too. I will look forward to a lot more hockey in the future. It is truly intense!!

I’m in Calgary! Fun times!! Lindsey Davies, Hannah Lee, Laura Leung, Landon Cooper, Noah and Crystal and Lisa, Katelin Simerson, Kristin MacQueen, Dustin, Carly, Edward, Simeon, Andi, Taryn, Trevor, RMP’07 (Brighid Happy Birthday, Melinda, Martha, Ian Edington, Ian Swentek, Sebastian Kim, Maryte, tons of other people)

No, I am not getting married right now. But the post does have to do with people getting married. It seems like I want to blog, but I don’t want to type. I just want to read other people’s blogs. But other people aren’t really updating either.

Today was Tim Richard’s bachelor party. The word on the street is that more guys from Western are getting engaged. At the bachelor party, amongst a variety of fun and Tim-embarrassing activities, it was evident that passersby were suggesting against anyone getting married. One person, when asked to provide advice for the soon-to-be-wed Tim, asked “Why are you getting married? You must be Christian!”

It’s true. From what it seems, no one except Christians really want to get married. If you can sleep around, bounce from partner to partner, live common-law with your legal spouse, or get everything you want without committing to anyone, then why get married?

So here are some reasons why getting married is lame:
- you need to commit to one person until death do you part
- you have to pay lots of money for a wedding and the wedding preparatory items (engagement ring)
- you have to spend months and months planning it out
- you usually have to have some government ordained minister to ad-minister the ceremony, typically being of a religious order or clergy
- you get chained to another person and you have no more freedom
- you are responsible for said person and you are accountable to them also

In this day and age, commitment is no longer needed. You don’t have to commit to any company, any person, any contract, or any style. The uncommitted choose to act on a whim or on emotion or on unsubstantiated reasons. You don’t have to commit to any brand, affiliation, or citizenship. You want the freedom of choice, and freedom from responsibility to your choices.

So, with all that said, how does a follower of Christ respond to the lackadaisical apathetic unassertive and uncommitted nature of our present-day culture?